Poem

When there is no time to say goodbye….

Shock and wonder.

Disbelief.

Sorrow.

These are the emotions felt.

Memories of the last words.

Were they kind?

Did I miss a sign? Micro fraction? Flicker?

Was there any inkling that this was coming?

Death has come like a thief in the night.

We fall asleep

Or blink …

And it has creeped in.

Taking from us our chance to say goodbye.

Wondering about the last minutes of life

The last breath. alone.

When there is no time to say goodbye…

There is only a hole in a heart.

October 6, 2009

This poem was written by me. A patient died unexpectedly at their home. I had known him for a number of years, but I always wonder that no matter how long you have a relationship with a person, can you really say that you knew that person well? Social psychologists talk about the masks that we wear. We put on different masks depending on the setting that we are in. We are one way with our family, work place, friends, in store, on the bus. We show different aspects but no one really has the full picture of who we are.

Regardless of how long I know someone, I also wonder what I can do to "know" that person better. I wonder if anyone achieves this in a lifetime.